Putting conflict into context
This section includes course notes, handouts and articles related to workplace conflict.
What is conflict?
Conflict is a normal, natural and inevitable aspect of working life.
"Conflict occurs when an individual (or a group of individuals), believe that another individual (or a group of individuals) is preventing them from achieving their needs or goals; preventing access to the resources they need to achieve their needs or goals; or preventing them from expressing their values or beliefs in a way which they consider to be reasonable. Our actions, our reactions and our interactions determine whether the conflict becomes and remains constructive or whether it becomes destructive… “
David Liddle, 2009
Destructive conflict is not healthy – it is avoidable, and it is escapable. The root cause of destructive conflict is a sense of loss arising from our unmet needs (Loss of confidence, face, esteem etc.) The loss triggers negative emotions and behaviours which can become, hostile, divisive and eventually harmful.
How and why do conflicts escalate?
According to extensive research undertaken at the TCM Group, we have identified 5 distinct stages to conflict:
Stage 1: The pre-conflict stage
This stage relates predominantly to the underlying or root causes of conflict. For instance, change and conflict are inextricably linked, and one often drives the other. Other factors include the role of the leadership, functional, systemic and structural factors, cultural and political factors or factors relating to the distribution of resources or rewards.
This stage develops as the parties experience the initial stages of the conflict - often referred to as ‘fight or flight’. The parties’ positions may harden, and communication becomes limited and disrupted. Alliances and cliques begin to form, and the parties blame each other for the problem. As parties ‘enter the conflict zone’, divergence between one or more of their needs, goals or expectations begin to emerge. This leads to a sense of frustration and anxiety for the parties and the early warning signs may include reduced communication, hostility, inappropriate behaviours and attempts to isolate one another. The parties adopt a series of positions to communicate their own points of view, which can become mutually exclusive and seemingly irreconcilable. This adds to the frustration, anger and a sense of mistrust for all parties as their positions are not accepted or realised. Frequently at this stage, the parties lose sight of common ground and focus on the factors that have driven them apart.
Stage 3: The mid conflict stage
Resolving differences at this early stage and encouraging the parties to ‘let off steam’, step back and talk the issues through can be very valuable. By engaging the parties in a process of open and honest dialogue, positions can be softened, behaviours changed, attitudes realigned, and dialogue developed. However, many managers miss this vital opportunity to ‘nip the conflict in the bud’, leaving the conflict to fester so it requires only a spark to ignite it and throw all parties into an uncontrollable and destructive spiral of stressful and damaging conflict.
Taking a stand
Resolving differences at this early stage and encouraging the parties to ‘let off steam’, step back and talk the issues through can be very valuable. By engaging the parties in a process of open and honest dialogue, positions can be softened, behaviours changed, attitudes realigned, and dialogue developed. However, many managers miss this vital opportunity to ‘nip the conflict in the bud’, leaving the conflict to fester so it requires only a spark to ignite it and throw all parties into an uncontrollable and destructive spiral of stressful and damaging conflict.
At this stage, the protagonists may try to forge alliances with people they believe will support and strengthen their position. Inflexibility and stubbornness become the staple diet of the conflict and tactics may appear confused, irrational and increasingly aggressive. These behaviours, however, reflect the parties’ perceptions of reality -their ‘truth’. In conflict, our sense of the ‘truth’ is extremely powerful, and any attempts to force parties to accept another ‘truth’ may be viewed with suspicion. It is hard for parties to listen at this stage. They are planning their strategy, and the ability to empathise is one factor which is seriously undermined.
This stage often sees the parties engaging in coercive and destructive tactics to ‘win’ the conflict (I win; you lose). Often this is a very challenging period for managers and HR and is typified by increased grievances, allegations, absence and stress for all parties.
Stage 2: The mid conflict stage
The Blame Game
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The Blame Game
As the conflict escalates, the parties’ tactics are aimed at gaining and maintaining the upper hand. Both parties are convinced they are in the right and that the threat to their values, needs, goals or expectations is real and substantial. The language of blame becomes the language of the conflict…
• “You should back down …you are wrong”
• “They always behave like this and should be punished”
• “If it wasn’t for them…”
• “You’re the manager; you do something about them…”
This language is aimed at presenting the other party as the wrongdoer and influencing decisionmakers to take their side. It can become increasingly threatening, sometimes even aggressive and violent. The parties are being driven by their emotional responses and may experience symptoms of stress and anxiety. They may try to project an image of righteousness and strength while absolving themselves of responsibility for the conflict.
The blame game prevents protagonists from looking inward and maintains an unhealthy focus on the tactics and games being played. Any reasonable attempts to engage the parties in communication may result in bickering, arguments and hostility. It is unusual for either party in a conflict to win the blame game….
Actions speak louder than words
Not unsurprisingly, as the conflict escalates, the communication and dialogue trail off with the parties beginning to feel further debate is unlikely to resolve anything. The parties develop strategies that will make the other side back down and yield to their demands – they aim to block the opposition from attaining their needs, goals and expectations whilst enabling theirs to be met. As the communication process fades into distant memory, it is replaced with a series of non-verbal signals and actions. The protagonists form stereotypical views of their counterparts based on assumptions and prejudice. Typically, these are wholly inaccurate, but they are used to rationalise and justify their own behaviour and activities. Tactics include:
1. Provoking the other person to act in a particular way
2. Trading insults and negative comments
3. Preventing the other party from accessing information, files, records etc.
4. Issuing threats and ultimate
Attack and counter attack
These threats and ultimately become increasingly rigid and inflexible. As the conflict continues, the parties start to view each other as almost sub-human. They react violently to one another and may experience high levels of anxiety in each other’s presence. Given the codes and norms of the workplace, it probably won’t be easy for them to engage in open hostility, so the attacks and counter attacks become increasingly subversive and devious.
The parties may start to feel out of control and their alliances begin to fail as the conflict becomes more serious and threatening. They may lose sight of their strategy and begin to demand immediate actions from their counterparts, some of which will leave them with little room for manoeuvre. If it hadn’t already, the conflict will now have taken over and the parties are entirely locked in. To back down now would end in a loss of face, submission and failure.
At this stage, the parties may seek external assistance, sometimes as a tactic to strengthen their position, sometimes as a genuine cry for help and support.
Stage 4: The late conflict stage
This stage sees the conflict erupt and become all consuming. Alternatively, the conflict slowly ‘eats away’ to such a great extent that a previously well performing team begins to fail and implode. Either way, the cost of the conflict can be significant, extensive and often formal procedure or court action is the outcome. At this stage, the fight or flight response is extremely powerful, and the basis of the parties’ activities is survival at all costs. In the workplace, the parties are at war. The smallest spark could result in an all-out offensive and the normal rules of engagement have been tossed in the bin. The parties engage in often brutal and increasingly desperate attacks and seek to inflict as much damage on the other as possible. They will seek to damage their opponent’s reputation, integrity, power base and alliances.
They may lash out blindly and may even seek to inflict damage upon other staff, managers, representatives, mediators or negotiators.
As the conflict grows in intensity and sucks other people in, the pressure increases, and the parties experience extreme levels of stress. Then BANG - suddenly, like a volcano, it explodes or like a collapsing building it implodes. At this time, the conflict will be potentially highly dangerous with very little consideration of personal needs; it is about winning at any cost. This can have a number of outcomes, including: both parties being subjected to disciplinary action; one or both parties pursuing grievances; one or both parties being dismissed; a criminal investigation; or litigation by the parties or the organisation.
Stage 5: The mid conflict stage
Of course, someone has to meet the needs of the customers, deliver the services, heal the patients, drive the lorries, deliver the post etc. It is often up to HR and managers to pick up the pieces and to retain a balance between the needs of the parties and the needs of the business. This is never an easy task, yet it is made even harder when the parties believe that they are right and everyone else is wrong.
What can managers and HR do?
An effective conflict management or dispute resolution strategy should take account of the 5 different stages of conflict and should enable managers and HR to recognise the nature of conflict at each stage.
Moreover, a workplace dispute resolution strategy should provide the parties in dispute, their managers and HR with an effective range of measures to help resolve the conflict swiftly, effectively and, most importantly, constructively.
Constructive and destructive conflict
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Constructive and destructive conflict
• Smouldering
• Fanning the flames
• Stoking the firer
• The blaze
• The explosion
• Counting the cost
• Repairing damage
• Letting off the steam
• Cooling down
• Building bridges
• Getting together
• Working on the problem
• Settling
• Preparing the future
Potentially Constructive Conflict
Potentially Destructive Conflict
Based upon a model from ‘Playing with Fire’ (1992)
Nic Fine and Fiona Macbeth; LEAP Confronting Conflict/Youth Work Press
The ingredients are the people concerned, their personality, ideas, values etc. The combinations and conditions are the factors that contribute to the conflict (people, power, politics, culture, environment, leadership etc.) The spark is the immediate event or incident that triggers things off. Conflict can develop in different ways from here. The left-hand column depicts potentially destructive conflict and involves our typical image of negative conflict. The right-hand column depicts more constructive responses which may in turn lead to improved communication, understanding, trust, respect and tolerance.
This figure represents the two extremes of conflict and what actions may be required to take a conflict on a destructive or constructive path.
The 3 components of most conflicts
Most conflicts are basically made up of three separate components: content, interaction and expectations.
1. Content
This describes individual’s concerns. It tells us what the conflict is about from their perspective. Within conflict and particularly at the early stages of mediation, we are often faced with a variety of differing accounts. This is natural and indicates that the contents are different according to individual perspectives. Often there is limited commonality about the content of the dispute.
2. Interaction
This describes how people behave towards one another and their feelings towards one another. The interaction will be based upon how an individual perceives the conflict along with their own conflict management style. Generally, interactions, prior to mediation, have been negative and harmful.
3. Expectations
This describes individual’s expectations of how they want the situation to be handled or resolved. The expectations may often sound like a demand and are often put forward as non-negotiable. Often expectations are outcome-orientated and are based on a premise of blame. Typically, expectations seek a win/lose outcome.